budget hearing

As you know, we’re in the midst of an extraordinary situation. Sixteen publicly elected and county-funded lawyers have declared war on democracy in Lane County, Oregon. Newbie Lane County District Attorney Alex Gardner and the fifteen LaMe County Circus Court Judges (Mary Ann Bearden, Greg Foote, Doug Mitchell, Cynthia and Charles Carlson, Lauren Holland Jagger, Jack Billings, Ted Carp, Chuck Zennache and cronies) are hellbent on thwarting the will of the other 208,123 registered voters in Lane County.

A majority of the 10-person Lane County budget committee voted against using the last $16 million of the Secure Rural Schools funding from Uncle Sam that was porked on to one of the (dozen?) 2008 war appropriation bills (thank you Senator Wyden and Representative DeFazio!!!!!!) to restore the capacity of the Lane County Jail to its 2007 level. A majority of the 5-person subset of the Lane County Budget Committee commonly known as the LC Board of Commissioners also prefers to invest the money in something other than Prosecution, Incarceration and Slammer Services (PISS) kindly provided by Sheriff Russ Burger and LCDA Alex Gardner.

Of course, we should not be surprised at the disdain for democracy exhibited by Gardner, Bearden, Foote et al. Alex Gardner ran unopposed in the November, 2008 election because he received a whopping 36% of the vote when he ran unopposed in the May, 2008 primary. Five or six laMe county circus court judges also ran unopposed in 2008.

Please do not misunderstand. I am not saying that the loathsome lawyers funded at the county level are that much worse than their corrupt, sub-standard cronies at the state and Federal level. In contrast to LCDA Alex Gardner, whose name did not even appear on the November, 2008 ballot when he ran unopposed, ORAG Kroger ran against himself on the November ballot. Gardner’s name appeared zero times on the ballot. Kroger’s name appeared twice – as the Democratic and Republican nominee. LCDA Gardner and ORAG Kroger make a mockery of the democratic process. DeMOCKracy is right.

Then there’s the Federal level. If the hombre in the cracker house (that’s what Barack and Michelle Obama renamed the White House – the Cracker House) has his way, there will be SIX Catholic Justices on the Supreme Court. [What’s the optimal number of Catholic Supreme Court Justices? NUN! What did the priest say to the altar boy? REDACT!]
Then there's Federal Judge Kent in Texas and Federal Judge Coughenour in Washington. Aarrgh. Grrr.

The bottom line is that sixteen democracy hating lawyers who are publicly elected and funded have declared war on democracy in Lane County. Ms. Bearden, Mr. Gardner, Mr Foote et al: Your message has been heard loud and clear. Touche (too-shay)! That’s French for I lift my sword back at you and spit on your grandfather’s petunias!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9V7zbWNznbs

Just to clarify for Commissioner Dwyer, who comes from Philadelphia. Touche (too-shay) doesn’t mean we’re going to Shea Stadium to watch Mets like Tom Seaver and Tug McGraw and Jerry Grote and Koosman. Too-shay is French for let the games begin!

Go malamutes!!